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Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Wendy's Ghost Pepper Fries

A bunch of people have been bombarding me with messages about how Wendy's has Ghost Pepper Fries now and how come I haven't reviewed them and all that.  Geez, it's like people think all I do is drive around looking for different places to try fries.....wait.....okay, maybe I kinda do that a little bit.

Anyhoo,  stopped by my local Wendy's this past weekend to see what's up.  I didn't take a picture of the outside of the Wendy's cause you should probably already know what one looks like but here's the inside in case you've never seen it.

Prominent sign on the menu.  That's pretty cool. Fries sure seem to be coming up in the world.

The place was empty, and I was the only person ordering but that didn't stop the guy from insisting that I give him my name for the order so he could call it out when it was ready.  I told him my name was Kyle.  This is what he wrote on my ticket.  My Wendy's name from now on will always be Tyler.

Even though the place was dead, they did not hurry to make my fries.  It took like 10 minutes (which is like 3 years in fast food time).  While I waited I looked around.  Giant vats of ketchup?  Check.  So America.

All you can eat saltines?  Check.

Not so subtle stoner/drunk signage?  Check.

Bizarre and confusing rails to corral the non-existent masses?  Check.

After the agonizing aforementioned wait, behold.

I was.....impressed.  There was actual green stuff on them and they tasted great.

The sauce held what I calculated to be a .00000023% solution of ghost pepper.  But you can hardly blame them cause .00000024% would have people gagging and complaining that it was too spicy.

For $1.99, the Ghost Pepper Fries are a good deal, and they are good.  If you spooned these out on a plate and presented them at a fancy restaurant you would fool most people (and you could charge $8.99).  I say they are worth a try.  9 out of 10.

Saturday, April 25, 2015

LEGOLAND Fries with the Grunion

The Grunion loves Lego.  Really, really, really much.
Editor's Note:  The Grunion wanted me to start off with that.

When we were in Florida a while back, we decided to measure the radius of his head explosion by taking him to Legoland, which (duh) is a Lego-themed amusement park in what used to be Cypress Gardens.

He was pretty excited to get into the park but we wanted him to take a picture with Amy in front of the sign.  Amy had to catch him.

Ah.  So nice.  Memory preserved.

The Grunion worked himself into such a frenzy, he said he needed a moment to compose himself so he took a quick break to calm himself right there on the pavement.

The park wasn't crowded at all, and the Grunion got busy right off the bat with some kiddie rides.  It's important to note that the Grunion has been playing with these things his whole life, and seeing them in "real life" size has to be the biggest thrill.  Imagine if you saw a giant version of Rock 'em Sock 'em Robots or a life-sized Stretch Armstrong?

The Grunion liked the kiddie rides, but quickly graduated to full on roller coasters.

Brave kid.

While the Grunion and Amy were riding the roller coaster a second time, I moseyed over to the fried chicken restaurant to try the fries.

I don't recall what I paid for em, but even if they were $1 it would have been too much.

Soggy, lifeless, tasteless, sadness.  Boo.  0 out of 10.

On the way back through the park I saw this joint.  Apple Fries?

Normally I would consider this kind of thing an abomination, but I was so depressed by the fries from the chicken place I decided to give em a try.  Apparently they are just cut up granny smith apples that are dusted with some magic dust and deep fried.


 They come with whipped cream, and I opted for the (extra charge) caramel sidecar as well.

I was skeptical, but they were.....AWESOME.

The Grunion agreed.  He especially like the whipped cream.

Basically they taste like McDonald's hot apple pies.  I was much impressed.

Even with the criminally exorbitant price tag, these things are boss.  10 out of 10 (but only cause it's an amusement park)

On the way out, the Grunion demanded the largest, most expensive Lego set from the strategically placed massive Lego store.  We were too tired to argue.

Mission accomplished.

P.S. The Grunion made me take a picture of him with these Lego bananas.  And he wanted me to point out that they were Duplo bananas, which are Legos for babies, cause babies should be able to play with Lego too and just because they are babies, blah blah blah a thousand more words about Legos and babies.

Thursday, April 23, 2015

South by Southwest MEGA POST

When I was younger, I would always get excited about going to SXSW.  For those of you who aren't familiar with SXSW, it's a giant conference in Austin, TX where a bunch of weirdos go to showcase their arty and/or businessy stuff.  It used to be just music, but now it's film and web stuff too.

When I was working in radio, I would go down there to see all the new bands that were coming up, and the record label people would schmooze me to play their records.  Now that I work in the "interactive" world, I go there to learn stuff.  It's quite different to actually have to be "working", but whatever cause Austin has fries.  I have been to Austin before, but these places were all new to me.

This joint is on Rainey street, which is a cool respite from the terminally disgusting 6th street travesty.  Seriously, if you are over 19 years old you do not want anything to do with 6th street.  Anyhoo, they have Green Chile Pork Cheese Fries.  NICE.  Whoa.  You can get them without queso?  Who would even think/want to do that?  I mean, cheese is in the name even!

Damn near 9 bucks is steep for some fries, but....POW!

These things are serious business.  Green chiles are not very spicy, and work really well with the shredded pork.

I'm fairly certain that the bit of heat these things have is from some stuff in the queso, which you can see clearly here.

These things are a solid 10 out of 10.  Worth every penny.  Also, Fire Eagle is awesome.

Japan Tex Dog
I was kinda hungry as we were leaving Javelina (I had to share the fries) and noticed this strange hot dog cart (some tool named Derek photo-bombed my pic).

The offerings were "unconventional" to say the least.


I tried the "Kurobuta Terimayo".   It was nasty.  No picture.  Do not eat.  You will dishonor your family.  Also, no fries.

Max's Wine Dive
This joint is in the heart of downtown-right across the street from what was the Real World house OMG!  It's one of those places where you can see right into the kitchen.  I guess that's cool.

They have fried chicken AND WINE cause that's so Austin.  Also, Austin people love flash pictures at night in dark restaurants.

Got this cone of truffle fries for $5 cause it was happy hour.

They were pretty sweet.  The dip was good too.

They weren't the best thing ever, but for $5 they are a 10.

Salty Sow 
This place was a trip.  I mean a long trip from downtown to way North.  It's in a neighborhood even.

We sat outside even though it was about to rain cause that's what the cool kids in Austin do.  Look at this guy sitting at a huge table all alone.  He is so Austin.

Triple Fried Duck Fat Fries is a big batch of words.  Let's see what that's about.

Damn!  Looks legit!  The eggs are little weird/unnecessary but ok.

Weirdest thing ever.  These things looked awesome, but they were totally meh.

Also, the cold bearnaise(sic) made my friend throw up a few hours later.  It coulda been something else, but he ate a lot of it and a chef friend of mine said you can't just have bearnaise(sic) sitting around that is not made fresh, etc.  Suspicious bearnaise(sic) aside, $8 for these things is no bueno.  5 out of 10.

Fado Irish Pub
Let me start by saying that Fado is amazing.  A lot of joints around try to be an "authentic Irish pub", but Fado kills it.  I was too preoccupied with not getting crushed by all the other people in the place to take many pictures, but here are the happy hour fries with three dipping sauces (Curry, Guiness BBQ, and Harp Lager Cheese Sauce).

$5 for this deal at Fado during SXSW is pretty awesome.

The amount is not great, but the overall quality of the potatoes (naturally) and the sauces makes them a total value.  10 out of 10.

Buffalo Wild Wings
I got home kinda late (9:45) one night and had not had a chance to eat.  Luckily, there was a Buffalo Wild Wings next to our hotel so I decided to check it out.

Not too many cars here...

Cheese curds at 10pm?  Seems like a good idea!

Boom!  Tasty.  They weren't fries but I would give them a 10 if I ran a cheese curd blog.

The fries were not good.  I think I have relayed info on this in the past.