As most of you know, every year on the 4th of July I like to cook 100 hot dogs and harass my family and friends into eating as many of them as possible.
Some call it sick, I call it patriotism.
This year everyone wanted to skip what they called "my sick tradition" on accounta it was gonna be "soooooo hot" and "hot dogs are gross", etc. but I was havin none of that commie whining. Clearly as we have gotten older, hot dogs don't have the same appeal any more. I had to think of a more creative way to get people to eat them (cause I don't wanna be stuck with leftover hot dogs any more than the next guy). I decided that making it into a game that adults like was the best way.
Wicked Witch of the West voice: Jenga. Jenga will make them eat.....
Cookin 100 hot dogs aint that hard. You get 100 dogs.
100 (or so) buns.
And you grill em till they're kinda hot.
JODONN: I'm only drinking beer this year, so don't count on me to eat any.
GIBBY: No problem, Osama! I thought you were dead anyway!
RUSTY: I'll eat some hot dogs Gibby.
GIBBY: Thank you Rusty. You are a patriot. Please kill Osama Jodonn.
GRUNION: I'm not eatin any meat tubes either. Cheese dip is way better.
Z: Whoa! What's cheese dip? How does it work? Are you supposed to rub it on your nose first?
GRUNION: Get away, Z. You don't want any part of this. You don't want to get addicted like me...
Inside, I had the Beez assemble the Jenga tower. It didn't work as well as we thought it would (meat towers seldom do), but I thought it was...
Majestic!
Proud!
Red glare-rockety!
Z: Hey Grunion! Check this out!
Z: I've got this water pistol. Fill it up so we can squirt everyone.
GRUNION: Hold on. This big wand thing is way better. Watch me trick the fat guy.
Z: Whoa! Wait for me!
GRUNION: Daddy! Daddy! Come over here Daddy! That's it....closer...closer...HYA!
Gibby's note: You can just barely see my sunglasses...
At the end of the day, there were about 30 hot dogs left. Dammit! Oh well, there's always next year.
By the way, the clear winner this year was Daisy the Lab, who ate an estimated 12 hot dogs. This estimate was based on the amount of hot dog parts she barfed up the next morning.
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