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Thursday, December 2, 2010

The Grunion and Z vs. Santa

The Grunion and Z were doing some driving practice (prior to taking their driver tests next month in preparation for getting jobs as welders) and we happened to pass by the mall.  Unfortunately for the grown ups, the mall's sign was advertising the presence of Santa.  The Grunion and Z wanted to check it out, and since they were driving, we had no choice.

GRUNION: Dude, why are you always in this thing?  Get out so we can tear it up!

Z: Hold on, I'm making.

GRUNION:  Check it out-Calzone flight cases! 
Z:  What's a flight case? 
GRUNION:  Ask your dad.

Z:  I dunno about this.  This food-looking stuff seems to be fake.

GRUNION: (to Santa) Dude, what's the idea puttin fake food all around your joint?  That ain't cool.
SANTA:  You're a fine looking 3-year old.  What's your name?

Z:  Hey Grunion, check out that mommy's shoes.

Z:  Why are they putting kids on that Santa guy's lap? 
GRUNION:  I dunno, but the fun killers are all amped up like that time they put us in those monkey suits!

GRUNION:  Run away!  Run! Run!

Z:  Wait for me!  I can't run yet!

***kicking, struggling, yelling***

If you're gonna sit your little one on stranger Santa's lap, do it as soon as possible, cause it will get worse and worse as time goes on.  For the record, I have never understood the process.  After seeing Ralphie in A Christmas Story utterly discombobulated and betrayed by the Santa experience you would think that all Gen-X parents would shun the practice.  But no.  The children must sit on Santa's lap.

The children. must. sit. on. Santa's. lap.

Victory:  Santa
P.S.  We also saw this.  Why won't anyone tell them?

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