Target Cafe

Went to Target the other day.

While we were checking out, the Grunion noticed that there were fries on the menu at the cafe.  As a matter of fact, there was a combo deal for 2 bucks that got you an order of fries and a soda.   We checked it out.

The fries are giant (like 1/2 inch wide) crinkle cuts cooked in one of those TurboChef hot tornado ovens that uses a combo of microwave and hot air to cook stuff.  They looked okay.

Since we got the fries AND a soda for 2 bucks, technically the price was 1 dollar for the fries.  We made the Grunion review them.
GRUNION: Seriously?  You're gonna make me review hot air fries?
AMY: Go ahead honey, you might like them.

GRUNION:  Okay, here goes...

GRUNION:  Meh. At least they're big...

GRUNION:  Let's see....there are 31 fries here...

GRUNION:  And at a dollar for the order that's....uh..... 3.225 cents per fry.  That's not too bad.  I'd give the whole deal a 7 out of 10 cause you get the sippy too.

Castle Costume

One year (2004), I decided to be a castle for Halloween.
GIBBY:  Hey, I think it would be cool to be a castle for Halloween.
AMY:  What?  You are so weird.
CHACHIE:  We could make it out of all the cardboard boxes in your garage that you never threw away since I've known you.  I'll help you make it for free beer.
AMY:  I'll watch.  And drink free beer.

After a bunch of strategic thinking (beers) we decided that it would be WAY COOLER if the castle could fit TWO people inside (you know, for pictures).  Chachie and I got to work "building" and painting.  Several hours later, I had Chachie try it on.  We further determined that we needed some windows on the tower that you stand in AND the drawbridge should totally open.

It was truly brilliant structurally speaking.  The thing balanced perfectly when one person was inside the box, and we cut a big hole in the bottom for people to stand in there with us.  This pic gives kind of a "behind the scenes".

The castle costume was a big hit.

It was kinda hard to sit down in it though.....

Grunion and Z vs. Halloween

Meanwhile, on a hill overlooking the heart of Fayetteville.....

GRUNION: So what's the deal man?  Why are we here?
Z: Dunno, but the meal tickets are all jazzed up about something so be on your toes.

GRUNION:  Be cool, here they come.
Z: What are they carrying?  Looks like a couple of big kitties.

GRUNION:  Sweet lord.
Z:  I'd like to be excused from this exercise due to my lack of interest.

***wrestling, crying, kicking, screaming***


GRUNION:  Well, we are definitely screwed this time.  Once word of this gets out we won't be able to hang out with the cool kids.
Z:  My head feels weird.  What's a cool kid?

Z:  You look so goofy I think I'm gonna crap my diapers laughing!

Z: And the outfit seems to add a few pounds in the belly as well.  Not at all flattering....

Z:  Can we take these things off now?

GIBBY:  Not until we take a few hundred more pictures.
GRUNION and Z:  *sigh*

Z:  What are you doing?
GRUNION:  Play dead man!  I heard that's what you're supposed to do in situations like this!
Z:  That's around bears, dude.

GRUNION:  Seriously?  I thought playing dead was for everything scary.
Z:  Nope.

GRUNION:  That's it.  I'm outta here.
Z:  There are strange crinkly things all over the ground.

Z:  Look!  I can balance one of the crinkly things in my mouth!

GRUNION:  You know what?  These things are actually kinda comfy.
Z:  Yeah.  I think I'm gonna wear mine for a few months.

Victory: Halloween

Oldie But a Goodie II: Ed Walker's

Once upon a time (12:45 pm in June of 2005), we went to Ed Walker's Drive In in Fort Smith to try and defeat the 5 POUND BURGER CHALLENGE.  It was an epic day.  Enjoy.

As we arrived in the parking lot, I thought we should document our arrival for posterity.  A bum hanging around the place who was clearly on meth offered to take the picture for us, but I thought the old "camera on the car roof and the self-timer trick" would be better.
GIBBY:  Let's see....timer....set?  Push this button to start the timer and....DAMMIT!

As we settled into position, we felt confident.  The waitress guessed which of us would be successful.
WAITRESS:  Um...what's the guy's name in the razorback shirt?
US:  The Beez.
WAITRESS:  He looks like he'll take 3 hours to finish our smallest burger (she was right about that).  That fat guy in the blue shirt with the sunglasses might be able to eat two of them.

***Fat Albert-style laughter from the whole crew***

I would like to point out that Clay told us about this burger challenge, but refused to participate (probably cause he didn't want to get his white shirt messy).

Four of us decided to attempt the challenge.  I was surprised to hear that Ian thought he could do it.
GIBBY:  Ian, are you sure you want to try?  I will pay for the burger, but you have to really try...
IAN:  Oh yeah!  I can do it!  Get me one!
GIBBY:  Okay....

We were a little blown away when they delivered the behemoth burgers.

IAN:  Wait...you mean these are actually made of actual hamburger meat?  Gross!  I'll just be eating the fries and drinking sodas.
GIBBY:  Grrrrrrrr.....

About half way through the 45-minute time limit, Sexy Brad announced that he just sharted.  Chachie requested to be seated at a table at least a county away from Sexy Brad.

GIBBY:  These other guys are chumps.  I got this with 5 minutes to spare.

WAITRESS:  You didn't eat the massive salad that comes on the burger.
GIBBY:  Wha?  I HATE onions and pickles and tomatoes!  Can you just bring me more fries to make up for the volume?
WAITRESS:  Nope.  Time's up.  You fail.
GIBBY:  Dammit!

After eating 5 pounds of hamburger (and lord knows how many more pounds of bread, fries, and soda), we needed to use a restroom.  We all decided that the best idea would be to use the restroom at the Fort Smith airport since it was voted "Best Public Restroom in America" by Cintas in 2005 (seriously, check out the USA Today article HERE). 

Ed Walker's is still there (on Towson), and still offering the burger challenge.  I don't suggest you try it, but it is worth seeing once in your life.

Big Ball of Nothing FINALLY on itunes!

As I told you all about a month ago, Paul Summerlin's EP Big Ball of Nothing (required listening) is FINALLY available on itunes.  Click HERE if you are lazy.

The music-reviewing website New-Reviews has already called Big Ball of Nothing kick-ass (in their polite, British sort of way).  Check out the review of the song In You I Believe HERE. 

If you read this blog (for free) regularly and find some joy in it, consider it a favor to me to go to itunes and download Big Ball of Nothing.  You won't be disappointed.

Live Music at IHCC

Iron Horse Coffee Company (IHCC) doesn't have fries (mostly due to the indolence of Emery), but they WILL have live music on November 5.  Go check it out.  Incidentally, IHCC is located on south 1st street in downtown Rogers across from the train station.

Hugo's

Hugo's is located on what used to be Block Street, but is now a construction war zone.  Fitting that Hugo's looks like a bomb shelter, eh?

Actually, now that I see it again after about a year it really does look like a bomb shelter/basement pub in England around the time of the war....

 
And apparently they are keeping up the theme with world war 2 rationing-type prices.  $2.75 for chips guv'nor?  You must be bloody mad!

At least they have black and tans to lessen the blow....

****Secret private message for Shannon P. starts here.  If you are not Shannon P., scroll down to the picture of the fries.
Shannon, Hugo's has some AWESOME beer cheese soup on the menu AND THEY WERE NOT OUT OF IT WHEN AMY ORDERED IT.  Amy told me to tell you nyah, nyah....nyah, nyah, nyah and so forth.

Some of you may know that I am not a fan of taking a raw potato, feeding it through a commercial fry cutter and dumping the cuttings into oil that is not at a high enough temperature for an insufficient amount of cooking time.  I am also not a fan of paying $2.75 for 32 fries.

Especially when they are a soggy, tasteless, uncooked, and utterly depressing mess.

It makes me mad and depressed.

I had been putting off rating the fries at Hugo's because I knew that they sucked.  They have always sucked.  It is especially depressing because Hugo's has a lot of other stuff going for it (cool atmosphere, good location, great other things on the menu, good selection of beers, etc.).  Alas, they fall way short of anything even remotely resembling decent fries.  5 out of 10 (because they should know better).  This is a picture of me leaving 23 of the 32 fries on the table.

The Grunion Has a Party

The Grunion turned 1 year old this past week, so we had a party to celebrate the fact that we kept him alive that long.  Since the Grunion only has 1 friend (Z-and we are not sure Z likes him yet) the rest of the people at the party (besides family) were really friends of ours.

Since the Grunion worships Elmo, his party was Elmo-themed.

Complete with Elmo cake.

And his own personal "smash" cake.

Amy made these cool party favors out of baby food jars the Grunion had emptied over the past year.  Very clever, but most of the candy tasted like green beans.

Having a party for a 1 year old is not like having a party for adults.  Babies can't really open the presents.

Or blow out the candles on the cake.

And they make a real mess of themselves with the cake.

Actually, we have adult friends who make a real mess of themselves at birthday parties with cake as well.  Maybe  baby parties are similar to adult parties....