GRUNION: These headbands should help the razorbacks win the game, huh?
Z: Nope. Our 4-3 cover 2 man double nickel defense is how we're gonna win.
GRUNION: This thing is itching my head. Can you scratch the back of my head?
GRUNION: To the left....lower....higher....more left...
GRUNION and Z: TOUCHDOWN!
***2 hours later***
GRUNION: And another touchdown. Boring!
GRUNION: When I'm big enough to play college football in 2 years I'm gonna be kicker cause apparently they get all the chicks!